March 13: The People's Burger

It's a heavy drizzle today, and I'm avoiding the cafeteria because I hear in the news that the microwaves are spying on us. I want somewhere close, and I'm strongly considering hitting up Pioneer Square Market for something greasy. I'm in that sweet spot of time between the day I get my annual blood draw for checking my cholesterol and the day my doctor says "hey, don't eat that." Hitting the elevator, I consider Asia Ginger Teriyaki instead. It might be a little bit healthier, but I had teriyaki chicken a few nights ago. Grand Central Bakery would probably be a better choice still, but those lines, though. Maybe there's a food truck out there worthwhile.

I step out into the rain, and -- what's that, comrade? -- there's a food truck I haven't seen out here before. The People's Burger? Da svidahnia, other options. The line's short and there's about a dozen others milling around waiting for their order. The guy in the window tells the customer in front of me that it'll take about 10 minutes. I'm getting wet, but decide to order the Drive-In Burger and fries anyway. No vodka nor caviar on the menu.

The sign in the window says their Angus burger is "NW prairie raised", which means something, I guess. Maybe my burger was raised by the farmer 10 miles north of Quincy who yelled at several of us in 2015 for geocaching on the road near his fenceposts. I hope so, because I'm sure yelling makes the beef more tender, but perhaps armed defense of privately-owned prairielands isn't in line with the truck's communist theme. But I digress.

I grabbed an umbrella from the lobby and waited only about five minutes for my order. Rainwater mixed with the ketchup as I pumped it into a cup, and I carried the whole tray back into the office.

It's pretty good. The burger was cooked all the way, no pink, but not overdone and far from tough. It sat in a very thin layer of grease, just enough to make the bun glisten, my keyboard discolor, and my doctor cringe. The fries were floppy, and a few didn't separate from their frozen pals in the oil, so they were a bit underdone. On the plus side, they're tossed with seasoning salt, something that isn't done enough around here. The web site description mentioned a tomato, I found pickle slices instead, which is a huge win. Stupid tomatoes.

If you're young, or you're otherwise healthy, or you don't care what your doctor or babushka says, then this should be on your short list of food trucks. I hope I don't see it again, because I might order another burger.

The People's Burger
Drive-In Burger, fries, Diet Coke, $12.99 (dollars, not rubles)
Food truck in Occidental Park