August 9: Cheese Wizards

This is the droid you're looking for.

What sorcery is this?

A challenger appears!

The Lady of the Lake placed me on a quest to seek out the best grilled cheese sandwich in the area. In April 2017, The Great Northwest Soup Company emerged victorious, throwing Beecher's into the Pit of Despair, and designating Grand Central Bakery as a wretched hive of scum, villainy, and eternal lines.

During that quest, I encountered many a traveler who spoke kindly of a stout yellow truck housing two legendary Cheese Wizards, sons of Ballard but native to the wilds of Bellevue, on the dark side of the pond. Alas, the journey would be too lengthy, the conveyances too treacherous, the rewards too meager.

That'll be a dozen Zorkmids, sir.

But yesterday, I learned from a member of my party that a wormhole had opened: the wizards have made the journey.  When the stars align every Thursday, they appear where the paths of 2nd and Columbia meet, across from an ale house known as the Metropolitan Grill.

It's not a far walk -- up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, start, according to one ancient map. We assembled a party of five adventurers for the quarter mile journey to sample their wares.

I ordered the Goblin King: three cheeses, chicken, peppers, and a mild sriracha aoli. I was achin' (yup, yup, yup) for some bacon (yup, yup, up), so added that, too. It came with a side salad and not cake. I added a cup of BBQ sauce from the Arc of the Condiments. (It's sacdelicious.)

If Great Northwest Soup's grilled cheese was good, well, they just took an arrow to the knee.

You are over encumbered and cannot run.

The Wizards' salad was as fresh as if ET himself had brought it to life. The elements of the sandwich -- cheeses, sauces, ever so slightly greasy bread -- combined to make a single, unified Voltron of flavor. I also chowed down on their large cookie, which was nearly as chewy and melty as their sandwiches. Om nom nom nom.

Now you know, and knowing is half the battle. The other half was already won -- by Cheese Wizards.

I'll be back.

Cheese Wizards
Food truck at 801 2nd Ave on Thursdays
Goblin King with bacon, cookie, Diet Coke, $15.24